Have you ever felt people lonely in a relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend? All you wanted was somebody who was going to love you back. Unfortunately, you learned the hard way that person didn’t want you. You wasted your 100% of your energy to make the relationship work. Meanwhile, your significant other gave you 50% of their energy. Now, more than ever, nobody deserves half of you they deserve all of you. If they want to play these mind games with your head, it’s time to cut them off.
I’ve met a lot of women in my life that didn’t want to connect with me. Half of the time, I didn’t even get an explanation leading to an uncomfortable silence. After suffering in silence, I had to learn the hard way, I can’t make a woman love me back. In life, I believe if your partner wants to be with you they will do whatever it takes to keep you. And if they don’t, they never wanted or needed you in their life, to begin with. You were being used for their pleasure.
Recently, I watched “Diary of a Mad Black Woman”, The following scene takes place with Helen and Orlando discussing their future plans. Orlando and Helen have had a brewing romance and now the honeymoon phase is coming to an end. Helen tells Orlando she’s going back to Charles, the man who mentally abused her. Orlando tried to convince Helen not to go back. However, she seemed to have her mind made up. Orlando proceeds to get up because he’s fed up with Helen. Helen tries to get him to stay in the diner with her.
Orlando turns around and tells Helen, “What, what do want? What do you from me? What am I supposed to say, let’s be friends, is that what you want? You don’t get it, do you? You see when you really love someone, I mean really love someone, you can’t just be their friend.”
Helen tells Orlando, “I need you.”
Orlando tells Helen, “And I don’t want just half of you.”
Furthermore, the movie made me realize you don’t have to be in a relationship with anybody who isn’t willing to build with you. Love can be so complicated but it can be a lot easier to slowly regroup yourself and move on. I remember the old, “Caleb Harris” would chase those thrills at the bars or clubs indulging in the devil’s poison. Only to wake up from my drunken haze feeling awful, insecure, lonely and resentful. I did this because I too was trying to get over any past relationship with a woman. The road to recovery and self-love isn’t easy. I had to realize that I can have multiple shots, smoke some more weed or aggressively chase after women and still NOT BE HAPPY AND FULFILLED! Therefore, I had to take some time to myself and realize that I deserve better. I needed to step away from a lifestyle of self-destruction and walk a straight narrow path towards inner peace.
Self-medicating yourself never fixes your problems. All it does is distract you from finding the solution. I want you to picture a time somebody hurt you. You decided to have a couple of drinks and probably got high (weed, cocaine, or acid). Keep that image of you in mind, letting loose and having a good time. You feel invincible like no one can stop you. And then, reality wakes you up out of your sleep. You then start to realize, you repeated this cycle yesterday, or even last weekend and you solved nothing. You’re still miserable. Right now, you have to ask yourself, do I want to keep living this way?
Lastly, the hardest lesson I’ve had to learn so far is learning how to let go and to start moving on. Why this was so hard for me to do is because we as human beings give into the temptations which resulted in us all loving the wrong people and not loving ourselves. We have given a lot of effort, only to get little in return. It’s important for all of us to remember that nobody deserves half of us. This method applies to your significant other, friends, family, or your job. Remember, you deserve better!
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