From a men’s perspective, lust has been the downfall of many men. Whether you believe it or not a man’s life force truly does come from below. I’m sure we’ve heard of the phrase, “Think with your big head instead of your little head.” However, do men, young boys, and adolescent teenagers even understand what that means?
I grew up around a mixture of men who’d either judge you for not having sex or they made you judge others for having sex. Back in the day I’d be asked by the bad crowd, “Caleb, when’s the last time you got some pussy?” Since I felt insecure around those that crowd I’d always lie so I wouldn’t look like a square. On the other hand, I also grew up the good crowd who feared God. They would often say, “Caleb, you know what the bible says about fornication. Fornication is sin and you will not enter the kingdom of heaven as a sinner because God will not approve.” Which would always make me feel like a had to be self-righteous and judge everyone else.
I’ve been able to keep an open mind to both sides but now that I’m older and I’ve experienced the “high life”, I’ve realized sex is not everything. I’ve also realize that us as men have been so far detached from gaining resources, establishing businesses, praying, fasting, and meditating that we have no idea what our purpose for living even is. Why? We weren’t able to create a balance with the information we received as young adults which caused us to be sex hounds or self-righteous prude as we became older.
Many men have always argued, “But Caleb, men have urges, we want to procreate, and it’s too hard for us to settle down with just one woman. I mean, it’s impossible do be with just one woman without getting some ass on the side because that’s just how we are as men.” I disagree though.
Yes, as men we do have urges and want to procreate which is perfectly natural. Sex is not a sin and men should enjoy it. However, when we become seducers and use women for our own sexual gratification and pass them away like trash it lowers our energy and inhibits us from creating any meaningful connection with a woman. Hints why you see men always saying, “Women ain’t shit!” looking in the mirror at his true reflection.
The truth is that relationships, working on yourself, and facing your own insecurities instead of running away from them is an essential part of manhood. Unfortunately, men have lost the way because we are too busy at the clubs, bars, scrolling on the gram and trying out various hook up apps just for a quick lay. Then, after you succeeded, you realize she wasn’t the right one. You were just horny.
Men that can’t control their lust can’t control anything. It’s so bad that young and old men can’t even complete simple tasks without focusing on some ass. For example, I’ve played basketball for many years. I’ve heard this phrase at 13, 16, and even at 26 years old, “Damn, shawty got a fat ass!” But whenever I would say, “Yo, can we continue playing or nah?” The same thing happens over and over again as well, the game abruptly stops. Unfortunately, I had to understand that even your own homeboys will put some ass over a basketball game. The worst part is your homebody could have been in the NBA too but because he can’t control himself he didn’t have the discipline to live his dream.
Sex is great when you are with the right person who loves, cares, and respects you for who you are. We as men need to decondition ourselves and other young men coming up that sex isn’t everything. Also, condition them to realize that it’s perfectly okay to be single and one with yourself. Only date someone if you are emotionally available and because you want “consistent ass”.
As I’ve said before, my lust for women had always made me feel empty inside. I’d always question myself, “Why am I not good enough for her?, Why hasn’t she texted me back? and am I even worthy of being loved? So many insecurities running rapidly through my mind instead of just saying, “If she wants me, she wants me. If she doesn’t, she doesn’t. Either way, life will go on with or without her because no woman is worth me losing my identity over.”
When you are addicted to porn, strip clubs, the bar and club life, and hook up apps like Tinder and Bumble (No, they are not for dating and do not tell me otherwise) you’re basically driving a car without any brakes. What happens when you can’t pump the brakes on your sex life?
1. You will lose your job
2. You will always lose your woman
3. You will lose your friends/family
4. You will become homeless
There are many men right how are saying, “Damn I wish I was in the NBA, had my own business, or a purpose in life so I wouldn’t be working this dead end job. Why are they saying this? Because these men can’t control their lust.
I had to learn this the hard way (the way I learn most things these days). My lust for women always broke my heart, mind and soul because I’d try too hard to make her love me instead of just loving myself.
Life is like a domino effect. Once I stopped lusting after women I no longer had anymore addictions to alcohol, weed, money, materialism or anything that wouldn’t bring any peace to my heart, mind, and soul. As a man you must learn how to reconnect with yourself because you are playing russian roulette with your life and the worst part about it is, you aren’t even winning anything. Your addiction to lust will leave you broke and feeling worthless. If you’ve made it this far and you still do not believe me. Look at men such as Nikola Tesla, Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson, and Malcolm X. Do you really think that any of these men would have become great if they didn’t control their urges?