I just want to be pure

One of my favorite films of all time is the Basketball Diaries. It’s a great film about promising basketball prospect Jim Carroll (Leonardo DiCaprio) who is constantly pressured by his wicked coach (Bruno Kirby) and a concerned mother (Lorraine Bracco). To escape his daunting life, Jim develops an appetite for heroin. Soon, the mean streets of New York City have replaced the basketball court as his main destination. Jim and his friends scrounge, steal, and prostitute themselves to score drugs. But in order to escape this endless addiction, his neighborhood friend Reggie (Ernie Hudson) may be his saving grace.

One scene I want to discuss is when Jim kidnaps Bobby from the hospital for a night on the town. Bobby and Jim start talking about if Jim is still writing or not. Which leads to Jim reluctantly telling him about his latest poem he wrote. Bobby grabs Jim’s notebook out of his hand and reads his poem out loud:

Little kids shoot marbles
Where branches break the sun
Into graceful shafts of light
I just want to be pure
I just want to be pure

Not too many of today’s films catch my attention like Basketball Diaries because most of them are just corny, redundant and lack any emotional connection to the characters, and overall, I don’t understand what these films are trying to tell me. Also, the majority of them are just demonic but that’s another topic for another day.

I find myself chasing purity everyday. Even though I no longer desire to be a womanizer, an alcoholic, or a pothead the devil tries to chase after me in my dreams. Last night I had a dream that I was in a violent altercation with somebody. They didn’t do anything to me but that didn’t stop me from beating them to the ground. I woke up in a cold sweat just thankful that this was another dream, even though it felt like a nightmare.

Life works in mysterious ways. Even though I’ve walked with God a little bit closer these days I find myself asking, “Am I pure or am I pure evil? Why do I keep having these violent dreams even though I no longer engage violent acts? Do I need to pray a little more or go seek some counseling or therapy again?

All I know is this though. We as people can only take life one day at a time. Purity does not happen magically overnight and you will have times where you are lost. But at this point, you might as well keep going forward. We all talk about falling back but rarely talk about falling forward. This is something I challenge all of you to do. When you feel like lying around in bed, relapsing, chasing any guilty pleasure that the devil is trying to lure you into, fall forward. The devil hates success and that’s why he keeps trying to get me and you in our dreams.
Our battle as people is mental, physical, and spiritual. And in all honesty, not everyday you will be in perfect alignment. You will be tempted by greed and hatred to poison your fellow contemporary today. Then tomorrow, you will be rejoiceful and gracious to be alive. It’s a fight to be pure and stay pure in God’s image. But it will not be given to you. Are you going to fight or are you going to lie around in bed in pity? The choice is yours.

Merch: https://www.zazzle.com/still_learning_sweatshirt-235944884407027935
Last week’s blog: https://unpopularopinionsdots.com/2021/04/12/i-thought-i-could-improve-without-god/
Basketball Diaries: https://www.amazon.com/Basketball-Diaries-Leonardo-DiCaprio/dp/B001GPNXRA

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