I know what you’re thinking. Why is this post being called 7:10 p.m.? Well, that’s when my mother’s boyfriend called me on Friday, October 29th, 2021, and told me the bad news. For those of you who are unaware my mother Dorian Heath Owens battled cancer for 1 year and a half. It was brutal to watch and I can only TRY to imagine how it was being in her shoes.
So much during this year taught me a lot about life and even brought me closer to God. Some days were great and others weren’t but I learned that life is about taking it one day at a time!
One day my mother called me during my lunch break. She informed me that she had fallen to the ground which left me feeling broken. I asked God how can this be? Can’t you just heal her already? What did she do to deserve this? Eventually, I learned that God has his own plans for all of us. We may not know them but He control’s everything.
With that being said, I packed up my lunch, rushed downstairs, and informed my admin, “Hey, I’m gonna go see my mother she just fell down!” He responded, “Okay, keep me posted!” I got in my car and dipped 65 on the backroads to get to my mother. (I know, I shoulda slowed down but let’s be real, that’s my mom and I would have gladly taken a ticket for the fine!)
Furthermore, when I got to my house an ambulance car was there. I was praying they didn’t take her because my mother hated being in the hospital. Covid was very high and hospitals had strict protocols. From my understanding around May or June (give or take) she didn’t have a roommate. It was just her by herself with not too many people checking up on her.
Mom told me, “Caleb, I don’t wanna go back to that hospital. I just felt hopeless and depressed which took a toll on my mental health.” I didn’t even know how to respond so I just listened and told her, “Mom, the family will take care of you but if you have to go back we have to send you!”
Honestly, uplifting her spirits was difficult! I’d ask God every day to just help me to go to work, keep myself in shape, and take care of my mom. Thank God as I ran into the house and opened the front door there was my mother, sitting down watching Law and Order. Ma told me, “I told them my son is gonna take care of me. I’ll be fine!” I wish that would be the turning point and she’d make a spontaneous recovery!
Months would pass and her tumor went up and down. It would be infected and I started to lose hope. I hate to say it but afterwhile my prayers began to be something like this, “God, you have my permission to take my mother. But if you want her to stay a little longer I’ll take care of her, the bills, the house, food, and everything else but I need your strength because my body is weak. I can’t go anymore. Thankfully, I serve a gracious God every day and he gives me the strength to push through when I have nothing else left.
Obviously, Mom’s passing wasn’t the best news to receive but now I’m at peace because even though her suffering was gruesome she’s with God now. And that right there was enough for me! How does one’s heart shatter into a million pieces but is then super glued back together you may ask? Well, when you walk with God He takes care of you. My heart was broken and I felt like I couldn’t move at times. I got 3-5 hours of sleep a night. I didn’t even eat some days or use the gym. Most of you are asking how I functioned? It was all God! Whether you believe it or not He has been a part of my life and a fundamental part of my mother’s life.
If you know my mother, she was just a great woman who’d help anybody in need. Even during the darkest days she still smiled and kept her faith in God. The Bible talks about how we as believers need to carry each other’s burdens during our walk here on earth. I believe I did my best to carry my mother’s.
My mother always said it wasn’t easy raising me and that it took a whole village for assistance. However, I always asked myself, “I just hope I make my mother proud when she passes away to be with the Lord!” She gave me that confirmation. When I went to visit her we talked about life, her will, life insurance, etc. but most importantly, she told me, “Caleb, I’m so proud of the man you have become!” That brought tears to my eyes because I’ve heard her tell me before but just to hear it again while my mother was on her death bed was just amazing!
Many of you have asked me is there anything I can do? I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I truly do believe all you can do is follow in my mother’s footsteps by being kind to others, forgiving your enemies, and striving for peace of mind. Life is just too short to be bitter towards somebody because of something they did to you or have any hatred in your heart. Let it go! We only experience life one time. Why be scared, bitter, miserable, and overall, just a dickhead to everybody because life ain’t going the way you want it to. My mother was never like this and I would encourage all of you to do the same!
In closing, on October 29, 2021, at 7:10 p.m. my mother left this earth. However, she transcended into heaven to be with her family. Right now they are rejoicing and praising the Most High. With that, I don’t need anything else but love and support. (Oh yeah, food is cool too, just saying!) Not every day is easy and I’m not looking forward to holidays but with God, all things are possible because I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me!