I died..

I died..

The world has fed me nothing but lies. I don’t understand anything this world has to offer me anymore When I came to Christ I became born again so whenever I tried to resurrect my old self, the demons would try to get me. Now I feel out of place because the old me is DEAD!

I was told that drinking was okay but never told how much I could have. Therefore, I’d day drink with my “buddies” and pretended to be happy. So I was an alcoholic.

I looked at porn at age 12 like I was watching a cinematic movie and then I started raping (jacking off) myself at 19 to experience more pleasure. So I was addicted to porn.

I didn’t start having sex until I was 23. I was so deep into club and bar life that every time I danced with a woman, it left me wanting more and more. Whenever I had a bad day or got bored with porn, I’d have sex with women because I wanted love and affection. So I was addicted to sex.

So what am I trying to say? Well, it’s simple. I WAS an ADDICT. But with God I have self-control and I feel loved. I am no longer a slave to worldly pleasures but a slave to righteousness. (Romans 6:18)

During my journey, I’ve realized that following Christ means that you believe Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins. That means anything you have done in your past is done, but they’re consequences.

Since I lived an old life of sin my body has experienced much pain.

◾My energy levels can be off some days
◾I battle extreme fatigue and mood swings
◾My back and knees give me problems
◾ I’m tempted in my dreams by sexual fantasies some nights
◾I have problems interacting with people because of my old judgmental tendencies

But I didn’t just give up. I took it to the altar! On top of taking it to the altar, I sought help. Thursday and Saturday I’m in celebrate recovery groups because I will not go back to the old me. I refuse!

When I started blogging about mental health I did not discuss the Gospel. For that, I apologize!

The Gospel says in Revelation 12:11, “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.”

When I was in the world I thought I was crazy for telling my business. But then I told myself, “People need to hear this. I don’t know what will come of it. But people need this!”

Now, I tell myself, “God wants me to be triumphant. I am not a Pastor, just a man of God. I must tell my testimony to let the world know how REAL God is!

In John 9: 1-12 Jesus healed a blind man with mud. The story discusses how the followers of Jesus Christ thought the parents of the blind man sinned. But Jesus informed them that the parents were not sinners.

After Jesus healed the man by spitting on the ground and made some mud with saliva then put it on the man’s eyes. Afterward, Jesus instructed the man to wash in the Pool of Siloam. When the man followed Jesus’ order, he came home with a vision in his eyes.

In context to today’s world, many people are blind to the vices of this world. They can physically see but spiritually, they are blind. They’re blind to the fact that Jesus heals those who earnestly seek Him daily. Those who confess their sins, repent, pray, fast, and remain humble will receives fresh pair of SPIRITUAL eyes.

Give your life to Him. What has life been for you? Has life just felt like excruciating torment and never-ending torture? If you were like me, knee-deep in yo’ flesh you know it is like to feel empty! From my experience, when I just surrendered and admitted I am powerless over my life, I received my spiritual eyes. I tell you the truth, the world will let you crash and burn but Christ will lift you. With that being, will you follow Him or follow yourself? The choice is yours!

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